I’m shedding :(

A fellow blogging mama recently shared her experience of post-partum hair loss, or shedding, and it struck a chord. I realised I never shared my shedding story previously, maybe because it meant admitting to myself it was happening, maybe it was embarrassment, but it might have just been lack of time then totally forgetting (I had a newborn remember!)

This picture doesn’t even begin to represent the amount of shedding I’ve experienced over the past few months. It started slowly, but there were days when I was scared to touch my head out of fear I’d just be touching scalp.  My hairline is the worst – it seems to have receded at an alarming rate. Boy2 is 18 months and I’m still losing hair!

But in 9 or so months of shedding I have realised:

  • shedding is very common. Lots of women experience it post-partum, to different degrees
  • we shouldn’t be ashamed to share it. Sharing is caring afterall and just hearing about other people’s struggles, can make you feel a bit better
  • in most cases, other people won’t notice the loss half as much as  you expect them too. Even the hubster only really notices it by the random hairs  on the bathroom floor. I’m sure he thinks I’m hiding some afro-wearing dog in the house
  • I can get quite creative with my hair if I’m feeling a bit self conscious

I’m hoping this is just a temporary thing. My hair will eventually grow back and I’ll have a hairline again. But in the meantime its another change for me to get used to. Learning about my new hair (or lack of) and getting to grips with new products to help it grow.

Please let me know if you have experienced hair loss and how you are getting on!

X

PS – to all afro-mamas. I’m trying a combo of shea butter and castor oil for my edges and trying to up my water intake. Lets see how I get on

 

 

 

Wave of Light… Feeling thankful

As I sift through my Facebook and Instagram feeds, I’m overwhelmed by the number of candle images I see. So many people sharing these images as a mark of rememberance or respect for everyone who has lost a baby as part of baby loss awareness week. 

My kids sometimes drive me mad. They make noise, they whinge, they’re messy. But they are here. I am able to shout and moan at them. But I can also watch them grow and develop each and every day. I can hug and squeeze them and tell them how much they mean to me. I love them so much it hurts. Not everyone gets to do this. 

Some people have experienced the anticipation and anxiety of pregnancy and maybe even the excitement of a newborn, but not the toddler or school years, let alone anything after that. I can’t imagine what that must feels like. 

So today I must remember just how blessed I am to have two healthy boys and how thankful I am for them. 

I will say a prayer for everyone whose experience of parenthood is now a memory. We can’t even try to understand or explain the reasons for your loss, but know that we all stand together and hope that your pain eases. 

#waveoflight 

#MiddleClassRebel

I walk into the kitchen to find Boy2 with the fridge door wide open, trying to open a pot of houmous! 

My mum, who helps out with looking after him a couple of days a week, told me that he stole the smoked salmon off her plate at breakfast time! 

I have some how managed to create some kind of middle class monster. I laugh, but do wonder if I should be exposing him to more crap. Not just food wise, but generally in life. 

My mother moved to the uk when she was just 18. From living in a dingy flat in Nottingham, to a cold terraced house in Salford and eventually a lovely three bed and the leafy ‘burbs’, she worked her ass off to provide for us. She used every penny she had to pay for our education (I’ll share my thoughts on education another time). 

We were lucky enough to witness her struggle and the eventual rewards. We are eternally grateful for what she sacrificed to make sure her children put on the right path. I think it’s paid off. We all have decent jobs, work hard, have good friends, give to charity etc. 

But now that she’s put the hard work in, she’s got these middle class grand children. They live in a nice part of Manchester, have good schools on their doorsteps and a wealth of extra curricular activities to choose from. 

Life is good. It could be better, and I want it to be better for them, but I’m acutely aware that by reaping the benefits and rewards of a previous generation’s struggle, they become less aware of how hard life can be.

Yes they know about poverty and drought. But that’s different to the everyday battles educated and focused people go through to provide for their dependents. They don’t realise that whilst they are tucking into brioche on a Saturday morning, their neighbours or class mates could be counting the number of slices of bread left to get them through before pay day. 

I’m not sure exactly what point I’m making in this post. I guess I just don’t want my children to take for granted the half decent lives they have been given, by becoming ignorant to others. 

Or is this just a case of middle class mother worries??